Joy

I have been in a mind quandary about something.
Joy.
I wonder if people really have Joy, or are Joyful, or know that feeling all of the time.
Or,
I wonder if instead people are faking it.
I kinda was thinking the later.
I think people are on auto pilot, and as part of the auto is the smile, not sparked by Joy.
But, guess what, I had a little bit of a break through in my hope for human kind.
or maybe, EmilyKind.
I am definitely in auto pilot. Get up, breakfast, lunches, kids out the door, Canyon homework time, paperwork, clean, ready, daycare, work, daycare, clean up, dinner, practices, games, scriptures, bed. Be happy, be interested, be auto pilot.
But last night at the end of that auto pilot there was a little crack into actual happy enjoyment. It was 8:30 p.m. and Carsons game in blackfoot was just getting started. No wind, no rain, no snow. By ten, he had hit a home run, and by 10:15, scored the running in. We hit Wendy's and got frosty's with the absolute best fries I've had in decades. Then for the next hour drive home, we dipped those salty, crispy fries in the frosty, and celebrated! It was pure Joy! The night I was anxious about because of the lateness, the drive, the cold, ended up to be one of the most favorite things I've done in awhile. So yes, there is bits of true Joy amongst the auto pilot.
Is it because I am mormon? Or because I am a mom? Or because I am the daughter of Vicki. Why do I feel this drive that life is supposed to be good  all the time. That Joy is supposed to ooze from us. That's not realistic is it? Why do we feel the pressure of that? I don't know. But, the better thing to know is that there are bits of Joy to be found, and that I don't have to run around feeling like I'm failing because Joy isn't found in the monotony of autopilot.
So there. That's all.